The Dr. On Call Is.

I realize this Blog is titled with the word "Jewelry" in it, and I should keep it business based. But if you would also notice, it has the letters "LF", that stands for Lindsay Fitchett, and that is who I am. There would be no "Jewelry" if there was no "LF", so as much as I would like to keep it professional, I ask you allow me to share what "LF" is going through, because ultimately it will affect the "Jewelry" part as well.

I anticipated "the" phone call all day, my mind would drift to my list of To Do's, yet came right back to wondering if the Dr. would call on time, and what the prognosis would be. Ultimately I knew once he called, my life would once again have to shift. I guess in my gut I knew the news wouldn't make me feel like dancing. He was supposed to call between 4 p.m. and 6 p.m. The time slot came and left, I wondered if he had forgotten to call, or if I just wasn't a priority. Understood. We watched Oprah while the kids played loudly, I cleaned our bedroom, laundry was done, we ate dinner and sent Lucas off to swim lessons. You can get a lot done when you have all this time to fill. Finally about 10 min. after 6 the phone rang, and my heart leaped. I was preparing myself for his all to familiar voice, and as soon as I heard it, I felt very important. It was my turn to get time with a Dr. that is good at what he does and he called to help me. Yes, I know it is his job, but hey, it was how I felt. I can remember the last time right after my surgery that I saw him, I thought, It was good to see you, but I would rather not see you again...at least for this reason.

As he talked about my MRI and X-rays, the prognosis wasn't good. Looks as if I have re-injured the disc he just did surgery on less than 10 short months ago. Not only had it re-herniated it but the actual bone (vertabrae) have started to twist and over compensate at the locations of the missing discs, or something like that. In my previous meeting with my Dr. he said that my spine is loose...how's that make you feel about doing anything. Will it go out now? Will it go out now? How about while doing this? Should it click or rub when I do sit ups...yeah, yuck.
To make a long conversation/story short, it sounds like I have 4 options:

1. Just live with the pain, awesome.
2. Do steriod injections, absolutely not.
3. Re-do the discectomy, hmm, not preferred.
4. Fuse at levels L4/L5, most likely, someday.

I can taste the salt of my tears as they touch my lips as I think about my future as a mother. Have you ever had to say "no" to your child when they raise their arms to you to scoop them up? Well, it sucks. My negativity can easily take over. No soccer, no running in general, no twisting, only kiddie rids at Disneyland, no moving furniture, sit up straight, lose weight, lift with your legs, hire a nanny, get a smaller purse, and breathe.
After the feeling of doom has been explored, I snap back to the reality that Jesus is in control. Easy to say right? He knows Exactly how I feel, He knows, how sad I am. He knows, how hard it is for my family. He knows, He knows, He KNOWS!!! He knows my desires to Be Well.
I would like to insert a positive sentence here about how I will just wait on the Lord. I suppose I will because that is all I can do. He allows these trials for growth. Boy, this is a doozy. Growing, Growing, Growing.

I choose Option #5.
Jesus will heal me. Either now, or when I meet Him someday. My body will be new, with no pain. He will get the praise as I go through this small whisper in time. This God that breathes out stars will say well done LF, well done.

My Dr. on Call is Jesus. The Great, no, Greatest Physician!